Sunday 20 March 2011

The Top of My Mountain

I’ve climbed the steep mountain… I’ve made it to the top… I’m standing on the summit looking down… Let’s hope it’s mostly downhill from here!!

I’m about to tackle something huge.  Something that I came here to learn how to tackle.  Something that is so important to me that I would give everything up just to make sure that I have done my best to make sure that it’s done properly.  It’s important to me.  It’s important to those that I love.  It’s one of those life changing things that could make or break a person.  I know that I have done my best to prepare for it.  And after all is said and done, that’s all that I really can do: My best.  After that, it’s really up to God – He is in control now.  I have faith in that.

I’ve been thinking about this for a couple of days now because I have seen how faith does not necessarily make it so.  Friends of mine have been trying to fall pregnant.  They did everything they possibly could to get it right.  They’ve been to specialists and they obeyed all the rules and followed all the advice.  They had done their best.  And they had an enormous amount of faith.  But each and every time, the pregnancy test comes out negative.  No matter how right they are, or how much faith they have, at the end of the day, it’s all in God’s time. 

That makes me a little nervous, and almost leads me to doubt some things… But how can I? One thing I know for certain:  He only wants what’s best for me.  He only wants what’s best for us all…  So we all have to stand firm in the fact that no matter what we think we need, or what we think is best for us, He knows better.  He has a plan.  A tailor-made plan.  The only thing you need to have faith in, is that He is in control.  The only thing that you can do from your side, is the right thing. 

I believe that I am ready.  I believe that I can tackle this!  I’m excited and nervous all at the same time. This huge thing that I am about to do probably means nothing to a lot of people, but to me, it’s what I’m here for.  It’s the reason I came clean.  It’s what life on earth is all about.  So I hand it over to Him.  And hope for the best.  A good expectation of things to come…. Hope…. 

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